As I already stated in the Introduction to Soreinu, this is a collection of the articles Nobara wrote for a magazine geared towards young adult females. It was generally an advice column that responded to letters he received, experiences he had, etc. But because of its popularity the columns were gathered into one collection for easy access.

The fact that this is the first column in the book is pretty important from a presentational viewpoint. It suggests that Nobara receives a lot of letters from girls telling him that they are lonely or too afraid of other people to make friends, or somehow ostrasized within their schools. This is, after all, an advice column. And that must be taken into accounts when reading anything from this book.

Many lolita are lonely or afraid of social situations. This is not uncommon, and nowadays there are a suprising number of hikikomori, children or young adults who will lock themselves in their rooms and refuse to leave the house or, at the most extreme, their own rooms. The reason for this is the inherent and highly stressful emphasis on conformity that Japanese society instills in its children from as young as pre-school age. Children work together, eat together, wear uniforms, clean up the schools together, solve their own conflicts together, teach their younger classmen, and are quickly ignored by their classmates if they cannot fit in properly. In Japan, the worst form of school bullying is completely ignoring a student. For an example of this and a rather brutal reaction and social critique, see the original version of the movie "Eko Eko Azaraku." And randomly, kaitai is also a form of bullying where kids rip one student's clothing off bit by bit until they're down to their gym shorts/underwear (see the Kodomo no Omocha anime for an example of this). For those who know the significance of this, you have good taste in music.

But back to topic, the most important thing to Japanese youth nowadays may very well be their friends. And a number of lolita are actually college or high school students who have come from the countryside and are living alone in dorms, removed from their family or friends at home. For them, the clothes become a surrogate mother or friend, and so instead of focusing on the fact that they are alone and insecure, they can create a sense of security through their clothing by purposely walling people off. These girls, rather than the girls who go to concerts and hang out on The Bridge, are the ones more likely to be reading Soreinu and looking into possible subcultural influences in the Gothic and Lolita community. Thus they are the ones who will be reading "Soreinu." Thus do I read this article as a concession to them, a sort of blankey, that assures them their lonliness is a Good thing.

It naturally follows, then, that when Nobara says "maidens don't need friends," he doesn't mean for his readers to forget their friends or devalue them. He is saying to the readers who already have no friends that they don't need them anyway. It's like "The Fox and the Grapes." And while I have no doubt this statement does indeed play into Nobara's own ideology, it should be read first and foremost as him responding to these alienated readers and trying to reach out a warm hand to them. It's rather mixed I feel. I'd rather they went to the Gothic subcultural events and made friends, honestly.